Two Peas in a Pod
You know where this is going. Well maybe not. Everytime I hang out with ‘little’ I’m always blown away by how innocent he is. Of course I’m still not really used to being with a preteenager for an extended period of time and sometimes expect him to act as if he were one of my peers. When we’re together though, I don’t really have to check myself, it just suprises me that some situations tend to be more tame/kid friendly naturaly. His deameanor really leads our events to have these certain characteristics. His jokes are elementary, his manner of speech is light and joking, not cutting or crude, and the path that his mind takes most of the time is optimistic and excited rather than reaisticly scared or pre judged. It really is a pleasure. I wonder if all it takes is exposure to such characteristics to pick those up, or if he’s naturally a good natured person?? hmmm…
Well this specific post doesn’t involve the two of us together. It was actually inspired by a wonderfuly invovled big Erin Annie. She commented on a previous blog post about how when we’re, alone (without our ‘little’s) we are much less concerned about safety. When we’re with our little’s, in the car for instance, every noise, every creak, every weird movement scares us. We’ve become protectors and guardians, as we take these young children under our wings. It puts life into a whole different perspecitve and makes me realize that I really can’t be totaly who I am when I’m around ‘little’. I can be myself as far as character and personality but I have to by way more responsible and understanding that I have his life in my hands.
Even further than that, when I’m not with ‘little’ I need to act a bit more grown up than I usually would. That means so many different things (one less drink at the bar, only going 5 over the speed limit rather than 10-15, being more punctual, and being more friendly and outgoing around other people… they could potentialy be a connection that could enhance my relationship with ‘little’) I could go on. I seriously think about him all the time. It affects me way more than just hanging out with him and building our relationship together. Turning in homework was a bit of problem this school year and so I’ve really stressed a good work ethic, and being responsible through our relationship. Since I ask that of him, I have to expect it from myself. This may sound trivial but since our match I now try to go to bed at a more reasonable time so as to be fresh and at the top of my game for work the next day. I don’t want to slack off while I’m asking someone else to work their hardest.
I have to be the change that I want to become, and ultimately what I want ‘little’ to emulate. I certainly don’t want him to become who I am, I want him to be the best he can be, but I want to be the same things that I’m asking him to be. So far, so good. I’m proud of him, and the small changes that I’ve seen over the last 3-4 months. (respecting my time more, not acting out around me, not cussing, and my favorite, becoming much more patient and considerate of other people)
The funny thing is I don’t think that I would have matched ‘little’ and I together, coming into this whole thing blind, but I don’t think Big Brother Big Sisters could have done a better job. Thanks a ton guys! It really has been an eye opening experience. I’m super excited to continue on.
What is this sludge mister??
I went on a trip to Kansas City with a buddy from work the week before and I was way farther over 3000 miles than I care to admit, especially being the son and brother of mechanics. They think (and they’re probably right) that I’m so derelict in my care for my car. I really wanted to hang out with ‘little’ but I felt like if I went one more mile on the sludge (oil) in my car that everything would lock up and I’d be carless, which would be no good. It’s incredible how I negelect the tools that are so important to me and my life. I only appreciate them when I don’t have em. Well, I thought I’d like to take this situation and turn it into a teaaching moment. I’d teach little about something I fail daily at, appreciating what we have and taking good care of our assets.
When I picked ‘little’ up I told him to go right back into the house and get his greasy clothes on because we were getting dirty this afternoon. He looked at me, looked at his clothes, and said, “I don’t know what you mean. I don’t have any other clothes that are different than these…” alright, onward and upward my friend!!
We went over to my house, and fired up the grill so we could have some hot charcoal ready and waiting when we were done being men and getting dirty. ‘little’ got right to it. I gave him the jack to ‘make the car fly’. I showed him how to make sure he was on the frame and then start pumping. He didn’t have enough weight to put into it so he had to jump on the handle to get the car to budge. It took him a while but he certainly didn’t want any help from me. We got some cardboard slats, slid em under the car and got to work. I showed him the under parts of the car. He was hooked.
"Let's Make It Fly"
It was so much fun to impart these skills to him. It really made me appreciate my old man and what he did for me. ‘little’ was tough and strong (as strong as a 10 year old can be) but delicate and definitive in what he was doing. He couldn’t get the nut loosened up at first to drain the oil pan so I got it for him but he was quick to take back the wrench. When he got oil from the drip on his hands he was so obviously in heaven. He really was a true grease monkey. I gave him a shop towel to use and without coxing he draped it from his back pocket like a veteran. I couldn’t wipe the grin off of myself, to see him so serious. I showed him the filter and he went to town trying to loosen it. When replacing the filter I explained that in order to get the best seal it’s good policy to moisten the o-ring by dipping it in the old discarded oil. He was eating up my direction and trying his hardest to understand what I was saying and why it made sense. Bolt back in, filter back on, I showed him the dipstick and how to measure the oil level. He filled her back up to the full line. He looked at me… “is that it?” You could see it in his eyes, he wasn’t even close to being done. We checked and double checked the air filter, trany fluid, oil level, washer fluid level, tire pressure, wipers, turn signals, break lights, headlights, brights, power windows, power locks… It was amazing. He was even intrigued by the double latch underneath the hood and we opened and closed the hood about 5 times.
Natural Grease Monkey
It’s fascinating seeing what excites him and what doesn’t. The week before we had gone to the science museum (which I still need to write about) and it was so hard keeping his attention on one task at the exhibit hall. He was all over the place and really just wanted to play around and he really wasn’t in learning about science related issues. Here in this situation he was so set on learning more, doing more, and immersing himself in the internal combustion engine. It was great to see him so fascinated. Seeing inspiration in other people is one of my favorite past times. That may sound weird but was more he was more intrigued than I’d ever seen him before and that includes cruising on the lake the week before in the fishing boat, ha ha.
This outing with ‘little’ was hands down my favorite. I finally have tapped into something that he wants to know more about. I’m not sure where this is going to go, but I’m sure we can find more similar activities together.
